That seat is taken

That seat is taken
Have you gone to sit down on a chair and suddenly you hear these words ‘ sorry that seat is taken’ clearly there was no one sitting on it otherwise you wouldn’t have made the attempt at all. Sometimes on the trains you actually sit down, either because you didn’t see the reserve sign or you were hoping the person wasn’t coming at all.  Suddenly before you realise there is somebody standing there with some sort of grin/ smile just looking at you with the words ‘ that seat is taken’.
It might just be me but i have come across that many times in life.

That job that you thought was definitely yours, that promotion that you have been preparing for, sometimes it feels like you were just warming the seat for someone to come and occupy. You are not quite sure what happened, did you miss the reserved sign or were you just keeping watch until the right person appeared? I have some very well meaning people in my life and recently when a seat suddenly wasn’t available anymore, there were all sorts of reaction and advice, someone even said you have to kick off. That sounded very tempting, I wanted to throw a big tantrum but upon reflection chose not to go that way. Firstly because it will not be a pretty sight and secondly because I believe there is a seat somewhere with my name on it reserved just for me.

You see where I come from, I have seen people carry their chairs from home to the school just so they can have an education. I have also seen the ones that have made a seat of the concrete floor, a piece of wood,  a brick, anything that has supported their tired legs in order to better themselves.
Do not worry when some opportunities elude you through no fault of yours. Keep trying, keep asking and if for a short time you have to make do with some uncomfortable tools as a chair, then do it with style. What you mustn’t do though is to become so used to the temporary position of insufficiency that you make it your destination. Don’t choose to sit on the floor when there is a chair available  with your name on it , reserved  just for you, don’t get use to being so disappointed that you stop expecting growth / better opportunities.
I am beginning to learn that we are stronger than we think and it is only in these circumstance that we catch a a glimpse of what is on the inside of us. If all opportunities are removed then me may have to create our own. After all, there are people are sitting in comfy chair but still have a bad back.
If that relationship hasn’t worked, cry, laugh scream , throw , do whatever you need to do to express your disappointment but let it be temporary, in a little bit dry your tears, square your shoulders, lift your head high and ask ‘ is this seat taken?’
For your consideration


A warm welcome 

This is the post excerpt.

Welcome to my blog.

Iam  a  wife, mum of 3 kids, an employee, a fan of Christ inside out kinda girl.

Iam on a journey to explore what Iam made of, hopeful all the work that is happening on the inside will start showing on the outside.

My journey at the moment is like a building that has scaffolding all around it, outsiders really don’t know how it looks like untill all the scaffolding is removed.

Building sites are by nature messy and chaotic but all being equal the results is worth the process.

Come with me if you are on a journey yourself.



not so open and shut

It’s not so open and shut
When I was growing up I so wanted to be a lawyer and used to hung around court rooms all the time. I remember hearing this particular phrase: this case is an open and shut one. Well in real life I find that not many situations are so straight forward and not all doors are just open or shut sometimes we have revolving ones.
My featured person here is my colleague and friend Mel. she so represents what I am trying to articulate here.
You see, my work place is a testament of the revolving door scenario. Who best to represent that than a girl who is both a recipient and a channel of grace. I hear people say all that time that things are not just black or white but grey , or grace as I would like to call it.
Speaking for myself, sometimes I have to use more than one chance to get a message or a lesson. What happens if that friend doesn’t get it the first few times? In fact the prescribed biblical option is 70 x7 t😊 ha I hear you say, not a task for us mere mortals. Well on the other hand we are so quick these days to shut the door to people after a mishap, we are a society that have no time for non speedy people.
Usually you will think people who have received extra chances will give it easily but this is not always the case. Sometimes we are even harsher on people who miss it like we did, maybe because they remind us of ourselves.😐
One time I was in my friend’s car and she went through one way street and when we realised, we apologised to the other road users as it was a genuine mistake. Some people were understanding but others not so forgiving. Just a week or so after we took same route only this time we went the right way and a young man had made that same mistake we made a week earlier. Of course he was very apologetic and my friend kept reassuring him that it was quite ok and that she had made the same mistake before. She easily extended grace to him and so it should be, but even a story in the bible reinforces that we don’t always do this as a society.

This week, We just wanted to remind ourselves that we shouldn’t be too hard on others when it takes a few attempts for them to get it. Secondly let’s forgive ourselves when we need to take 2nd and 3rd chances. After all  life is not so open and shut.

For your consideration
Sent from my iPad

The unqualified expert

The unqualified expert

I can hear giggles as you think of at least 1 person u know who deserves that title 😁
Above is my 8 yr old nephew who spent Christmas with me, he met his little cousin for maybe 48 hrs and he became quite the expert at her needs. At one time he said to me ‘aunty Afua you know babies have a mind of their own’ I laughed out loud and asked him to tell me all about it(quite the expert)
For the purpose of this post though, unqualified expert is actually in a positive way, for really how can an expert not be qualified in thier field of expertise?
The inspiration for the post is actually from the bible where people who didn’t have much found themselves in a position to give and somehow the obedience turned into a miracle of overflowing. An example is a widow who only had a small dough who though worried about herself and child had the task of first, feeding a hungry guest. A boy with only 5 loaves and 2 fishes was suddenly the person to bail out thousands of hungry people.
My whole point is that sometimes we cannot to wait to reach our ideal perfect place before stepping into purpose. We cannot wait till we are in a perfect happy place before encouraging someone. We may need to give a hug to someone when we ourselves have tears in our eyes. You may need to start singing whilst working on some issues, the oil may only increase when you start pouring.
If we decide to wait to serve only when we feel we have become perfect in our field we may be too late to help someone. I don’t know of a child that waits to perfect their walk before setting of. Sometimes we find ourselves in situations that call us to step out of our comfort zone and start serving in ways that we may appear unqualified in.
As we go through this week, let’s open our eyes to be of service in our community, to give a kind word, a reassuring hug, a pat on the back, let us not get too hung up on qualifications after aall He calls before He qualifies.
For your consideration

The corridors of life

A corridor is defined as a long passage in a building from which doors lead into rooms.
I don’t know about you but sometimes my life seems to be full of these corridors. In this post a corridor is used to mean a time of transition, the time that we seem to be walking but not quite at the door yet.

Some of these corridors are wide and busy, other people are going the same way or close to where we are going. We can form relationships in this kind of corridor, we may not feel the pressure of the waiting time depending on the kind of friendships we form. An example of this kind is university/college/training time: we are have been blessed enough to walk through the doors of admission and enter into the wide corridor of training time.

Sometimes and most often we walk these corridor alone, they seem long and unending, unproductive in the short term. Some of these are necessary for us to walk to get to a particular door for a particular assignment. These transitional/waiting periods can be lonely, u can sometimes hear the echoe of your own footsteps, it can be boring as lots of routine work is done here.
There is a semblance of the biblical waiting in these corridors, for although u are walking, it seems you have nothing to show for it.


But cheer up, I hear you say😀, there is room for development in this time, we build muscles from the walking .We learn to be in touch with our inner self in the quiet periods and hopefully build on our integrity: to do the right thing when no one is watching.
Yes corridors! They are everywhere, in marriages, in career, in ministry  work and in business. How we walk these long passageway makes a massive contribution to how we enter and stay in a particular room.

Relationships matter in these quiet periods, who you let in and who you kick out have an impact on the story of your life.
Yes corridors! u can have a rest in them, you can walk briskly in them or like my sister above pose for some photos😀
Maybe you can take a new approach to the waiting times in your own life just look at them as the necessary corridors that lead to the that door.
For your consideration

No to a huff and a puff

my sister’s stance above seems to say, i am standing my ground. 😁

Events over the past week have brought me to the point of needing to put some thoughts down. Insideout is usually a platform for lessons learnt from every day events. By Virtue of maternity leave, I bring you hours of research from baby tv and the very sophisticated world of nursery rhymes.

The three little pigs is a famous nursery rhyme where the big bad wolf ends up eating 2 of the pigs, because they built their homes with hay and stick. Well I like this particular version on abc kids tv as the wolf doesn’t get to eat the little pigs, although he blows their houses down with a huff and a puff.

The lesson in the rhyme is usually to encourage us to work harder and not just take the easy way out, but I want to share my lesson from a different perspective.
I was particularly captivated by the bad wolf and his methods. Staying true to his MO, he comes in the same intimidating way! He blows on the weak parts until we are exposed as our cover is blown. We then become so frozen with fear and he is able to consume us. Not on this occasion, for the little pig runs straight to his other brother’s house!
A lesson for me: although my own brick house may not be ready, I may know someone that is better and stronger in their faith, in their career or perhaps doing better in relationships than I might be. There is no shame in asking for support from the right place or speaking to the right people who can help steer us in the right direction.
The big bad wolf may be represented in many forms: toxic relationships, mental torture and anxiety, career breakdown, etc. For me I realize that when something unexpected happens, I suddenly become anxious about my abilities and giftings. I start doubting my self worth and blaming myself unnecessarily.
If U have a gift to give and someone rejects it, it does not necessarily mean that you are not good enough. It could be that they are not good enough to receive that gift! It could also be that it is not their time to receive it after all your gift is not for everyone! Fear and doubt make us read into actions negatively and if we are not careful, mental torture ensues.
Well as we are getting into the colder months, we wanted to remind you that, although trouble may knock at your door, may even blow your cover down, don’t give up yet; for there may be one more fight within you.
We may be very strong in our career but we might need some work in our relationships. Whatever it is that falls to the huff and a puff from the wolf, can be worked on with bricks thrown at us by life.
As we take our time to build ourselves up, there is no promise that challenges won’t come, but we can be sure our brick house will not easily fall to a huff and a puff.

For your help consideration



Today our pastor spoke about the unlikely choice, and it reminded me of the Cinderella story. David, in my opinion was one of such stories.
When the kingmakers went to his home to find a king, all his other brothers were presented in their finery, David however was at the farm looking after his fathers sheep.

By all outward appearance the brothers were more qualified than him, they were older, taller, bigger and looked more appropriate to be kings. However they were not the chosen ones, if that is not a Cinderella story then I don’t know what is.

We heard how the kingmakers and the parents presented the others and allowed them to try the proverbial glass shoe but that opportunity was denied David. He didn’t look like the typical potential king, he was probably untidy from working on the farm, he just didn’t fit man’s specification of a king.

I am sharing this here to remind all insideouters that we may not be what people expect, we may be the wrong gender, age, race, accent etc but don’t get discouraged because it still might be you who wears the crown.

They may refer to you as being unusual, unique, weird, different and so on but maybe that is not such a bad thing, the most important thing is having a good heart and being true to ourselves. David had all his experience from looking after the family’s sheep, it was during this time off camera that he got noticed and chosen.

If you are serving behind the scenes currently, be encouraged to give it your best shot. Who knows who might be watching? When the kingmakers come with the glass shoe, although you may not be present, people will come looking for you as no other foot will fit what has been made with you in mind.

As you go through this week, don’t discount yourself from that management position, that pulpit, that partnership, that marriage because all though you may not qualify on the outside, you may be just the right person on the inside. Let us remain true to ourselves no matter how different that may seem because being different is the best way to fit in.

For your consideration

The last call


It has been a while since I wrote anything, in the time I have been away, I have said goodbye to a dear friend and also said hello to another child. Today I want to share the lessons I learnt from the last conversation I had with my friend who has gone to be with the Lord and next time I will share my welcome news.
You see my friend and I had this relationship where we could go years without speaking, not because of any issue but because of the busyness of life. We made sure we connected on birthdays so I was surprised when I saw her ringing me a few weeks after her birthday. I couldn’t answer her call but she called again and followed with a text to say “afua ring me when you are free’. Well am I glad that I rung her as she passed away a few weeks after that phone call.


The gift of life, when we have the opportunity to be alive, we need to celebrate everyday. After I heard of my friend’s death, I went back on my phone to read again every message we sent each other, I went through our last conversation, trying to remember it word for word. Let’s appreciate people in our lives, let’s give attention to people when they are talking to us, someday we may need to remember what they said to us.

Our telephone conversation started with us not being in agreement, my friend had some opinion that differed from mine, she had always had strong views so we disagreed on some issues but like true friends do, we ended the call on a very mutual note, we both agreed that we could do better in keeping relationships. We realised that sometimes we get so self-bsorbed and forget the world around us.

Another memory from that last call was that my friend had chosen what was most important: her relationship with her Saviour. This gives me much joy and much hope, that there is eternity after this life and where we end up after here is really what matters.

Finally my dear friend left me with this lesson that whatever we have doing, business, family, ministry, we need to start today because tomorrow may never come.
This is to you my dear friend Akua Nyarko Opoku, you lived and left your mark in our hearts. I celebrate your life and I ask that you rest well as you go on to be with your maker.

Goodbye till we meet again

For your consideration